It was a no brainier. I flew back to the USA in January with 3 simple goals.
- visit my kids
- fix my bank overdraft
- find a treatment program
Eleven days later I was drunk on an airplane to Haiti. Again.
Now that I’m sober, I’d like to know what went wrong. Why couldn’t I walk into the closest rehab center and ask for help.
Here were my six excuses, plus my true objection to recovery.
1. I was too cool for rehab
I was when feeling those margaritas in that phone below. I thought rehab was for losers. Deep down, I was proud of my edgy love affair with booze.
2. Life without my phone was a deal breaker
So you want me to give up alcohol and my smart phone addiction? Show me the court order or shut your face. Seriously, walk away.
3. Amy Winehouse was in my head
Overdose is not romantic, but every addict hears this song in their head. No, No, No.
4. The price was too high
That’s my 9K in play money. Why are you asking me to spend it on shrinks?
5. I didn’t know what to pack
I was already packing to go back to the Caribbean. You can’t go two places at once.
6. I missed my girlfriend
It was a full-blown anxiety attack when she didn’t return my calls. Obsessive relationships can’t wait 30 days.
The simple truth – I didn’t want to get better.
Alcohol was my higher power, my best friend, my reason for waking up each morning. I wasn’t ready to quit drinking.
It would take another month of chaos before the spell was broken. Rock bottom is more than cliche, it’s where I finally came to my senses.