I’ve been really quiet on the blog and on Twitter.
For the last 2 weeks I’ve been drinking again and was quickly sliding back into the hell of addiction. I don’t blame circumstances, it was my choice to go back to drinking. It’s also my choice to go sober again.
Today I am working on my recovery again, but still trying to figure out what happened, but here is a rough sketch of the events.
Why did my sobriety fall apart?
- left behind my girlfriend in Haiti
- very depressed from BP meds
- burnout on the sobriety project
- came back to America with a drinking as plan B
- made new bad decisions
- more x-wife and kids stress
- isolated myself from the recovery community
- lied to my sponsor (and avoided him)
— Sober Tony (@sobertony) June 29, 2017
Why I’m going sober again?
- it never felt right or happy
- I didn’t forget how good sober felt
- I really couldn’t get drunk
- always woke up feeling defeated
- knew I was better than this
Progress not perfection
After reaching out to the recovery community again, I have felt so much acceptance and strength to get my life back in the right direction.
Even with this “lapse” I’m still a different person than before recovery. I feels like a setback, but something I can learn from and keep moving forward.
— Susanne Blumer (@susanneblumer) June 29, 2017