43 Days Sober – Addiction is a bully. Recovery is fighting back.

I hate bullies.

Especially when they hurt me and my family. Today, I’m connecting the dots and calling out alcohol for being a bully in my life.

Reading about bullying reminded me of life before sobriety.

Some signs that may point to a bullying problem are:

• Unexplainable injuries
• Lost or destroyed clothing, books, electronics, or jewelry
• Frequent headaches or stomach aches, feeling sick or faking illness
• Changes in eating habits, like suddenly skipping meals or binge eating.
• Difficulty sleeping or frequent nightmares
• Sudden loss of friends or avoidance of social situations
• Feelings of helplessness or decreased self-esteem
• Self-destructive behaviors such as running away from home, harming themselves, or talking about suicide

Alcohol was kicking my ass and stealing my lunch.

The bully situation is marked by an imbalance of power and the repeated harmful interactions. That exactly describes my life under the influence.

How did addiction treat you? Do you recognize these typical bully behaviors:

• Verbal bullying (Teasing, Name-calling, Taunting)
• Social bullying (Leaving someone out, Embarrassing in public)
• Physical bullying (Spitting, Tripping, Breaking things, Making rude hand gestures)

It doesn’t take too much imagination to see how addiction was a bully in my life. More correctly, after alcohol hacked my brain I became a bully to myself.

Drunk Tony was always beating Sober Tony’s down.

In recovery, I’m fighting back. Without a doubt I know that alcohol is not my friend.

Leave a comment to share your experience.

* Responsible blogger footnote: I don’t intend to diminish the real problem of peer bullying among children. I’m simply using this well-known issue as an analogy of my self-destructive behavior as an addict.

** If you’re in the mood, you can watch the whole Christmas Story fight scene below.