Archives for 2016

It's been too many days to count, but I'd guess around 40 days drunk in a row. Most of these were morning binge, nap, then repeat after dinner. My head is all wrong, so I can't write much today. Suffice to say the alcoholism came back … [Read more...] about Day 1 (again) I’m back

I really hate myself lately. The last 6 weeks have been a blurry nightmare. My drinking has been worse than ever and I can't seem to find the reset button. The addiction has me in a bad spot, in a beer for breakfast kinda way. I'm … [Read more...] about Where do you find the courage to start over???

I just finished the post about my relapse. Somewhere I read that those are normal, almost expected for alcoholics who are first beginning the recovery process. The important point (so they say) is to not let things spiral out of control. … [Read more...] about 18 Days Sober: Falling forward after alcohol relapse

I'm not surprised that it happened. For the last few days I've been losing resolve and struggling with the craving to drink.  I decided to buy some rum and have a few drinks after I mowed the lawn. That was an old ritual, but usually … [Read more...] about Relapse Day: Toxic friendships

I'm not sure who I'm fooling with this blog. I've had only 28 visitors to the site - none of them had much to say.  Nobody signed up for the email updates. It's basically me talking to myself and trying to figure out this drinking … [Read more...] about 17 Days Sober: Helping one person overcome addiction

It's been a crazy week, but I made it to 16 days sober. Our family has been very busy. I haven't slept enough. There are a hundred little things making me anxious. I keep hearing negative talk coming from my own brain. I am hungry, … [Read more...] about 16 Days Sober: I feel like giving up on recovery